Stupid people are the reason why I originally wanted to outsource our customer support to The Geek Squad in The Second Life. Who better to deal with stupid customers but the stupid geeks?
Everyone once in a while we get a complaint. This is very rare. You will have a hard time finding someone who has something bad to say about our DuroSport products. When we do get a complaint it is almost always a “user error”. And by “almost always” I mean ALWAYS.
Below I will reprint a complete transcript of a recent customer service encounter. Please note the following about this individual:
- She is not an electrical engineer (completely unqualified to state that there is a problem with our product)
- She obviously does not know how to use a simple ordinary web site.
- She did not listen to our theme song (there are useful pointers in that song)
- She does not have time to play 20 questions
If you know a stupid person, please urge them NOT to buy a DuroSport.
[19:09] Nero Rang: now what seems to be the problem here?
[19:09] DeeDee Lang: i tried using the player earlier
[19:09] DeeDee Lang: but it was very frustrating
[19:10] Nero Rang: May I ask what level of education you have completed?
[19:10] DeeDee Lang: graduate level, 3 sems to completion
[19:10] Nero Rang: and what is your background in electrical engineering?
[19:10] DeeDee Lang: Nero i don’t have time to play 20 questions
[19:11] DeeDee Lang: i’ve spent enough time trying to figure out this equipment
[19:11] You: I am sorry, if you are not willing to help me help you I can’t help you. Can I?
[19:11] DeeDee Lang: the point is it doesn’t work
[19:11] DeeDee Lang: so i asked earlier–is it a pretend player or does it really play in world
[19:11] You: I am sorry, but I am afraid there must be a user error and I am trying to figure out what your problem was
[19:11] You: Did you read the documentation?
[19:12] DeeDee Lang: :)
[19:12] You: And what exactly were you expecting? In what way did the Prism DuroSport SL6000vrmp not live up to your expectations?
[19:13] DeeDee Lang: i’m looking for a media player that can play my favorite songs in world
[19:13] DeeDee Lang: i read on your site
[19:13] DeeDee Lang: that the player can integrate with itune
[19:13] You: yes, it can
[19:14] You: did you get the iTunes compatibility kit?
[19:14] DeeDee Lang: no–not yet….i can’t even get past the same page
[19:14] DeeDee Lang: on the instruction button–it had 1 thru however many pages
[19:14] DeeDee Lang: but everytime i click on a page
[19:15] DeeDee Lang: the web page is the same web page over and over again
[19:15] You: and what page was that?
[19:15] You: Did you fill out a support request on our website?
[19:15] DeeDee Lang: no i didn’t.
[19:15] You: Oy, it is so hard trying to help someone who doesn’t want to be helped.
[19:15] You: Did you listen to the theme song?
[19:15] DeeDee Lang: no.
[19:16] Otto the DuroSport Security Robot: Do not fear our technology – it is mostly harmless.
[19:16] Otto the DuroSport Security Robot: Please see durosport.com for more information about product recalls
[19:16] You: There are many answers in that song as well. Especially about the iTunes compatibility.
[19:16] You: It is sort of a customer support theme song
[19:16] DeeDee Lang: thanks for the refund, Nero.
[19:16] DeeDee Lang: I have to go.
[19:16] You: If you heard the song you would realize that you are the only person who has ever had a problem with our product.
[19:17] DeeDee Lang: have a great evening.
[19:17] You: May I ask you for a testimonial?
[19:17] You: about your experience with the DuroSport?
[19:17] DeeDee Lang: you wouldn’t want my testimonial. :)